Keep it Classy, Australia

Yesterday was the Melbourne Cup. For those of you who don't know about it (I for one had never heard of it before coming here) it's a horse race. In fact, it's the richest and most prestigious two mile handicap in the world. It's billed as "the race that stops a nation." It's a big deal around here. It's even a public holiday in Melbourne. It would seem, after a few months now of careful observation, that there are a lot of Melbournites who will jump at any opportunity to drink excessive amounts of alcohol, gamble and yell. Actually, most of the time they don't seem to worry about coming up with an excuse. They just do it anyway. Well, with all this hype about the Cup, we were curious to see what all the fuss was about. We didn't have the money to actually attend the race, so we decided instead (because it was free) to attend what was advertised as "Melbourne's most glamorous riverside garden party" at the Crown Casino with our friends, Dave and Allison. Well, what can I say, it was in Melbourne and it was riverside, and if by glamour they meant white spandex mini dresses, and if by garden they meant astro turf, then I guess it was Melbourne's most glamorous riverside garden party. There was a square of astro turf on which sat a tent in which were crammed heaps of drunken Aussies in skanky clothes. On one side, there was a bar and a long line of mostly men waiting to place their bets. On the other side of the tent was another bar (of course) and another long line of mostly women waiting to get free make-up from Loreal. And let me just tell you that the last thing Australian women need is more make-up. Trust me, they've got plenty already. Totally lame. There weren't even any cool hats. The highlight of our day, besides the couple minutes of the actual race which were a little exciting, was trying to guess which of the boobs pressed against us were fake and which were real. We realize that's tacky, but sometimes tacky times call for tacky measures. Apparently, we missed the Real party. Check out these pictures I saw on Australian yahoo this morning of the aftermath:

That's right, folks, this is where we live.

Speaking of keeping it classy, the other major news story on Australian Yahoo this morning was: Britney lands in Australia. Yep, Britney Spears is here for her first Australian tour. We can hardly wait til she hits up Melbourne. For a mere $250-$15oo we can go to her show!! So, if you were wondering what to get us for Christmas, wonder no more!! I'm sure she'll do well here. We think Australia and Britney Spears go together like peas and carrots. They both like to keep it classy.